Wednesday, August 22, 2007

memory is a funny thing

7 months ago, as I watched my poor little skin graft slowly heal I would never have believed that I could ever forget what it looked like back then. In the ensuing months I have taken lots of pictures of my ankle and graft largely because my surgeon is across the country, and she wanted pictures in lieu of being able to see me. Therefore, I have pretty much every stage of my healing documented for posterity. A while ago, she asked if she could use these pictures for teaching and patient education. I happily agreed as I am a strong advocate of medical education and as a patient, I think I would have dealt better with the radiation side effects if I was better prepared for the dissolution of the skin on my ankle. Anyway, I don't often look at these pictures because a)they are not pretty, b) I certainly don't show them to others, and c) I barely want to remember it myself. However, my PT has asked me for copies of them to use for PT student education etc. Therefore, the other day I sorted this lovely photodocumentary of my ankle and let me tell you I had forgotten. If time is supposed to be healing, maybe part of how it works is by removing disturbing images from your memory bank. Maybe. Certainly memory is funny, as I never could have guessed that I would forget; however, I also never could have imagined that now 7+ months later, my skin wouldn't be completely healed, so maybe not fully knowing what you are getting into is a good thing. Still I celebrate my forward progress and watch for that final scab to come off.

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